Some people like you, some people don't. In the end you just have to be yourself.- Andres Iniesta
This is going to sound crazy vein and/or
conceited, but I really like me. Before you judge you have to understand that
it took a long time for me to
think that. There were so many things in the world that were telling me that I
was less than. Being black I went to mostly white schools. I did not have many
high school boyfriends, was the source of some racial jokes, and besides that I
was really freaking weird.
It was not until my sophomore year of
high school that I told myself I was going to be me. I was going to dress like
I wanted to dress and act how I wanted to act, and left it at that. I never
thought about myself being pretty or being desired, all I knew was that I was
going to embrace myself, my weirdness, and my own sense of style.
It was not until my senior year of
highschool that about 4 random boys decided to give me Valentine's Day flowers.
I was shocked, I did not know why. The crazy thing about it was that they were
not even black.
This is not to make anything about race,
but to state that somehow we can down grade out ourselves in our own mind. We
may say "because I am dark skinned" or "because I am black"
or "because I am short, or fat" I am not attractive. These were all
the things that ran through my mind as to the reason I told myself I was less
than.
As I got older, things did not change. I
still did not see myself as God saw me. I still struggled with self esteem, and
what I thought I wasn't. It was not until God waved a magic wand over my eyes
and all became clear. I began to see myself as pretty, funny, smart, unique, fashionable and all the rest of it.
Even if what I had to offer did not fit into some tiny mold of what others were
doing so what.
God showed me, it is the people who are
willing to be themselves and stand out no matter what other people say, are the
people who make the marks on the world. So many people try to be like Marilyn
Monroe, Anna Nicole Smith, Beyonce, or Kim Kardashian. Well guess what, there
is already a them. And they are going to be the best them they can be because
that is what and who they were made to be. You can never truly imitate someone
else, because it is not you and the end result will be some watered down corny
version of them.
I urge all of you, to put on your God
glasses, see yourself the way that God sees you, and when you do you will see
the beauty in yourself that you did not even know was there. Like me I used to
get embarrassed by these thing,
but now I have no fear if I make a complete and utter fool of myself as long as
I was being me in the process and I had fun.
Living by other people's standards or
ways of being will lead you into a life long of regret, bad relationships, and
all the rest. Living the way you want to, may not lead to a perfect life, but
you will be much happier for doing it. Understand! I hope so. Until next time.
Thank you
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